The Prodigal

Xena develops an appreciation for silence. Gabrielle gets caught between a rock and a hard place when she loses her nerve. She heads home only to find trouble brewing there. But, with the help of a newly reformed Meleager the Mighty, Potidaea is saved from the clutches of an evil warlord. And, Gabrielle and her nerve are reunited.

If I can just distract her long enough, I can swipe those damn pipes
Gabrielle: "Wow! Hey ... hey ... you know the Orpheus legend, how he played music so well that he moved mountains? Now, I know it's only a myth, but there's often a kernel of truth in even the wildest story. What if I just tried to ..."
Xena: "NO ... no."
Gabrielle: "It was just a thought."

Xena: "You're not only scum, you're dreaming."
Dreamer Scum Bag: "And you, my dear, are stuck between a rock and a hard place. So what do you say? Shall we be civilized about this?"
Xena: "Why start now."

Xena: "Nothing like a good ambush to liven things up, huh?"

Xena: "You alright?"
Gabrielle: "Yeah ... Yeah ... I'm good ... I'm good. Considering I was almost road kill, I'm perfect."
Xena: "C'mon, we've been in tighter spots than that."
Gabrielle: "Yeah ... yeah, you're right. Since hooking up with you I've nearly been eaten by a cyclops ... and I was almost forced to marry Orpheus ... practically squashed by a Titan ... why did I just freeze up?"
Xena: "I don't know, you burned out. It happens"
Gabrielle: "It didn't happen to you."
Xena: "No, that's why I always try to remember ‘act, don't react.' Go with your gut."

Gabrielle: "I froze, which put both of us at risk. If you hadn't been there, then ..."
Xena: "... but I was."
Gabrielle: "Today, yes, but what about tomorrow and the next day? I can't always expect you to be there for me."
Xena: "It was just one incident."
Gabrielle: "I can't endanger you. Don't you see that? I'm just a liability."
Xena: "It's a risk I think I can take."
Gabrielle: "I can't."
Xena: "I can't help you with this. You're gonna have to figure it out yourself."

Xena: "Where will you go?"
Gabrielle: "The only place I know ... home. My sister Lila's there. I can talk to her about this."
Xena: "What? You can't talk to me?"
Gabrielle: "Of course I can. I just ... sometimes you need your family to help sort out things. I have to find out what's going on with me and I have to do that at home."
Xena: "But you're coming back, right?"

Gabrielle: "How is it that Man can solve the riddle of the Sphinx but he still can't make a decent road map?"

These pictures ... ... are just ... ... too damn ... ... priceless
I feel that Gabrielle's hilarious attempts to hitch rides with passing wagons deserves mentioning at this point. "Gabrielle's hilarious attempts to hitch rides with passing wagons."

Lila: "I don't suppose you brought the Woman Wonder with you?"

Lila: "Is he (Meleager) dead?"
Gabrielle: "Dead drunk."

Gabrielle: "Now, tell me how we got stuck with him again?"
Lila: "You're the only one who's worked with a warrior before."
Gabrielle: "Warrior? Hah! Xena would never act like this. Shows a total lack of respect, not only for us, but for himself. A fighter can't afford to lose his self-respect. In fact ..."
Lila: "If Xena's so perfect, I'm surprised you can stand to be around simple people like us, you know, your family."

Gabrielle: "Lila, we need to talk."
Lila: "Talk? We haven't talked in months. Why start now? I'm going to get our meat skewer, at least I can rely on it."
Gabrielle: "What's that suppose to mean?"

Gabrielle: "Lila, would you please tell me what's wrong?"
Lila: "I already told you, nothing's wrong."
Gabrielle: "Nothing? Well, if that big freeze number of your's is nothing, I'd like to see something."

Meleager: "I'm awake. I'm awake. I am well aware of my surroundings. Where am I?"

Gabrielle: "You lost your nerve. That's why you drink."

Gabrielle: "The truth is you're all we've got ... and you're a worthless drunk."

Lila: "Tell me, Gab, is there anything Xena doesn't know, or should we just build her a temple right now?!"

Trying to talk herself out of trouble ... it almost works
Damon: "Who are you? What do you want?"
Gabrielle: "Well, those are two very good questions not to be answered lightly. After all, do any of us really know who we are? As for what we want, I think it was Sophocles who once said..."
Damon: "Kill her."

Meleager: "You have a plan?"
Gabrielle: "Any minute now."

Lila: "Xena really taught you a lot, huh?"
Gabrielle: "Yes, she did. Xena taught me when to fight, when to talk. She taught me how to know the difference between a friend and an enemy. And she taught me what it means to have a best friend."

Lila: "Dinar for your thoughts?"
Gabrielle: "Don't waste your money."
Lila: "Then I'll tell you. You love this village, love your family, your friends, but you have to leave, and you don't know how to tell us."
Gabrielle: "It's not just that. Lila, I want to be a part of your life. A day didn't go by that I didn't think of you and I missed you terribly."
Lila: "Your dreams are elsewhere. Gabrielle, you are destined for great things. Your heart belongs on the road, not here in this little village. If you stay here, your life will never be complete. Live life, Gabrielle, don't let it pass you by."
Gabrielle: "I thought I was the only oracle in the family."
Lila: "It doesn't take an oracle to realize that you belong out there in the world with Xena, helping to change people's lives for the better, like you did here.

Dreamer Scum Bag: "Well, well, well, we meet again. I guess you would call this a little rock and roll. You're not so brave without your well-muscled friend, are you?"

Don't jump!
Gabrielle: "When did you get here?"
Xena: "In time to see you vault that cart. Gutsy move."
Gabrielle: "That was gutsy, huh? I didn't freeze."
Xena: "No, you didn't."
Gabrielle gets her nerve back

DISCLAIMER: Meleager the Mighty, the generally tipsy and carousing warrior-for-hire, was not harmed during the production of this motion picture.

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