Chariots of War

Xena tries to stop a warlord from destroying a peaceful village, but gets in the way of a few too many arrows. Gabrielle develops a liking for the "wrong kind of guy" (who actually becomes the "right kind of guy" in the end). Xena battles a dozen thugs in a dress (which is very ... um ... inspirational). And, our two heroines walk off into the sunset.

Gabrielle: "So Zeus, in his appreciation, turned the two lovers into Oak trees. And, then, do you know what happened?"
Xena: "Someone came along and made boats out of them?"

Gabrielle trying to soften up Xena
Gabrielle: "I believe that everyone will find their tree in the forest someday, even you."
Xena: "I find that the strongest trees in the forest stand alone."
Gabrielle: "You don't have to be strong all the time, Xena. Sometimes it's good for the soul to be soft."

Xena: "Let's find someplace for you to stay."
Gabrielle: "What's wrong with this place?"
Drunkard: "Hello, beautiful. (Belch)"
Gabrielle: "Another place sounds good."

Xena: (to two young, arguing brothers) "I don't know what you guys are arguing about, but it will take more than an arrow to get rid of me."

Gabrielle: "I'm sure she'll be here any minute. She's very dependable. Of course, she also takes a lot of risks."

Xena: (to the children) "See, this giant had me trapped in this boxed canyon."
Argolis: "Did he try to step on you?"
Xena: "Yeah, sure he tried, but I was ready for him, and I jammed this big ..."
Darius: "Erhem."
Xena: "Uh ... feather."
Argolis: "You mean, you tickled his foot with a feather?"
Xena: "Well, not just any feather. See, you have to remember these guys have really big feet. I used to whole goose."

Argolis: "I wish I could ride with you."
Xena: "No, you don't. The road is a hard place to live, not knowing where you'll sleep, where you'll eat."

Tyldus: "She lied to you. Other people have heard of this woman. She's no warrior. She's a murderer, a killer."p> Xena: "What Tyldus said is true. I've done some terrible things in my past."

Darius: (to Xena) "Are you so brave that you fear someone caring for you?"

Ruffian: "Let me buy you a mug of ale ... but then you'll owe me."
Gabrielle: "How generous. Of course, I have to decline. I mean, what would people think? I mean, me, a young, innocent girl, taking gifts from a swarthy stranger. The gossip alone would send this town reeling."
Ruffian: "Is that a ‘yes'?"
Gabrielle: "Well, not in the customary sense of the word. I'm looking for a friend of mine."
Ruffian: "I could be your friend."
Gabrielle: "I'm serious and you better back off before I find her. It's Xena."
Ruffian: "The Warrior Princess?"
Gabrielle: "Yeah."
Ruffian: "I like it! I could be a friend to both of you."
Gabrielle: "And, I'm looking for my boyfriend ... big ... strong ... jealous type. There he is now. He's resting after polishing his giant, lethal sword collection."

Pretend you know me
Gabrielle: "Pretend you know me."
Sphaerus: "No problem."

Sphaerus: "So ... uh ... how long have we been seeing each other ... uh ..."
Gabrielle: "Gabrielle. And, you fell madly in love with me the first time we met."
Sphaerus: "It's no wonder, the way you kiss."

Gabrielle: "I'm looking for my best friend. Maybe you've seen her? Six feet tall, dark hair, lots of leather, fights like the Harpies in a bad mood? Her name's Xena."

Sphaerus: "That's very insightful."
Gabrielle: "It's a gift. Well, anyway, I came to a point in my life when I had to make a choice and I thought about who I really was, and I made it."

Can it be?  No, it can't...
Xena: "I've never wore anything like this before."
Xena in a (gasp) dress

Xena: "Sometimes you have to stand and fight."

Gabrielle: "Where have you been? I've been looking all over for you."
Xena: "I ran into a little trouble."
Gabrielle: "You? Trouble? That's a surprise. You could have sent a messenger. I was worried sick."
Xena: "I'm sorry."
Gabrielle: "Did you just apologize?"

Gabrielle: "I have no way of finding this guy again. I mean, what if I'm supposed to intertwine with him and have kids? Now, I'll wind up some lonely, pathetic woman like ... never mind."

Xena: "Jump!"
Gabrielle: "Are you crazy?!"
Xena: "Jump!"
Gabrielle: "If I die, I'll never speak to you again."
Xena: "Jump! C'mon, jump!"
Gabrielle: "Aaahh!"
Xena: "You call that a jump?"
Gabrielle: "No, it was a frantic leap ... best I could do."

Xena: "Don't tell me, that's him."
Gabrielle: "Afraid so."
Xena: "Remind me to talk to you sometime about your taste in men."

Gabrielle: "Are you alright?"
Xena: "Yeah, fine. Do you ever miss your family?"
Gabrielle: "Sometimes, but not as much when I'm with you. So, do you want me to drive?"
Xena: "Not on your life ... not on my life!"
Gabrielle: "Hey!"
Xena: "You sure you don't want to ride?"
Gabrielle: "Not until they make those things closer to the ground."

Hey, wait up for me!
Gabrielle: "I learned something really important today."
Xena: "That you can find goodness in unlikely places?"
Gabrielle: "Yes ... and I really hate chariots."

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